All-Star Rider

“It had always been just the two of us,” explained Rider’s Mom Jen. “Everyday stuff revolved around school and the sports that Rider was playing. I made sure that he was always involved in something. We also loved to do simple things like cooking together.”

Up until early 2020, Jen and Rider led ordinary lives. Jen was working full-time as a Healthcare Training Specialist. When she wasn’t working, Rider was her priority.

The warning signs appeared gradually. Rider’s energy level dropped, his grades started to slip, and he would fall asleep doing his homework.

Then Rider began to develop unexplained and significant bruising. In January Jen decided to take him to his primary care doctor. “It was my birthday of all days. I had taken the afternoon off and when I got home, I thought I should take him in since I had time,” Jen said.

Rider has been with the same doctor since he was a baby and so she knows them well. After running his labs, she said that the white blood cells were undetectable because they were so high and that they needed to go to the University of Minnesota hospital right away where the oncology team would be waiting.

Jen of course was crying, and the doctor gave her a hug. Jen whispered to the doctor, “You better send me to the best place this state has to offer.” The doctor replied, “I am!”

The University of Minnesota confirmed the worst – it was Leukemia. Surrounded by family and friends, Jen wanted to tell Rider herself.

“At that point I was scared,” said Rider. “I didn’t know what was going to happen. I had leukemia and they didn’t know when I would be able to go home. I started stressing and I asked my mom if I was going to die.”

“That was the hardest thing to hear your child say,” said Jen. “His next question was “Am I going to have to learn to walk again? I didn’t know the answer to either one of those questions.”

Rider’s cancer journey would be nine months in total which included five rounds of chemo. “I sat down with the oncologist and asked if my son would live. They told me “I’m sorry, I don’t know the answer to that.”” Rider had Acute Myeloid Leukemia, which is rare in kids of his age and much more common in babies or older people.

The thing you should know about Rider and Jen though is that together – they are inseparable and have an attitude that is aspirational for anyone. They called the hospital their “condo” in the city and their home their “cabin.” “I was sleeping on the very uncomfortable couch in his room until he started bribing me and said if I bought him a play station gift card, I could sleep at home,” laughed Jen.

The nurses were drawn to this charismatic young boy and they spent a lot of time with him. The sign on the door to his “Condo” hospital room read “Club Rider.”

“Every day, I would get up and play basketball with nurses,” said Rider. “I moved my bed and started roller blading in my room.” Rider also had a trike and would do laps in the hallway. He even attempted to complete schoolwork with a teacher until it got too hard.

Thankfully, the hospital was only 20 minutes away for Jen and Rider, but once the murder of George Floyd happened and then COVID in March of 2020, things got even harder for the two. The hospital went into lockdown, so they weren’t able to leave the room and no visitors were allowed to come, which meant Rider’s friends couldn’t visit to play basketball with him.

Jen started on leave the day they found out Rider was sick and her FMLA covered her for the first 6 months. She was lucky in that her employer kept her on and she was collecting unemployment through the pandemic.

“Pinky Swear Foundation provided some rent payments for us which was huge. There were times when I sat down, and I didn’t know how I would keep the house and the car. There was a time when I didn’t know if I would get unemployment. It was the biggest relief not to have to think about finances when dealing with this process. I had in the back of my mind, if I lose everything, it’s fine, I can get that back, but I couldn’t get my kid back. Having Pinky Swear Foundation come in, made me feel like I wasn’t going to lose anything. I could get back to normal at some point,” Jen said.”

As the two reflected on the biggest challenge they faced, they mentioned Rider’s fifth round of chemo. During which, his lungs collapsed and nobody knew why. He had to spend 14 days on a ventilator which was very scary for both of them. Thankfully he recovered quickly after that and was able to go home.

The thing is that Rider’s problems did not end when he got home. The mental toll was tasking for the pre-teen. From the outside, Rider looked like a normal boy. On the inside, he had battled a lot. Cancer forced him to grow up quickly and had a weakened immune system which impacted the ability to be a normal kid.

“People look at Rider and he doesn’t look like he has cancer, but they don’t see the mental side which is even harder than treating the cancer. It’s very hard to treat the thoughts going through a person’s head. Rider began to experience suicidal ideation and was admitted to a psych ward for 10 days,” Jen explained.

There was no football that season, school was virtual, and he was very isolated. He couldn’t go outside and play with other kids, if he got Covid, it could kill him.

During that time Jen received her own cancer diagnosis. “I almost threw my phone and said find me a room in the psych ward too,” she explained. “I didn’t want to share with him because of what he was dealing with. He was cancer-free, but his biggest struggle was afterwards.”

Both Rider and Jen are still working through it all side by side. Rider is focused on football, Jen on healing. It seems so unfair that this dynamic duo still have cancer to contend with as they try to just get on with their lives, but we are honored that they have been so willing to share their story with Pinky Swear Foundation.

“I am pretty confident now about how life is going,” said Rider. “I am focused on football, playing whatever position coach wants me to play, my school just won states last year. I am working. I feel the best I have ever felt physically, stronger than ever been and faster. I go back for check-ups every 3 months now; I’ve had perfect counts every visit.”

“We really appreciate the work that you guys do, it makes a huge difference for families going through this. It doesn’t get much worse than seeing your kid sick,” said Jen. “Thank you so much.”

KTTC Rochester featured Rider in their series "Kids with Courage" which you can see here: https://www.kttc.com/2023/07/27/kids-with-courage-rider-martin/